I couldn't tell if he was hitting on me or if he was just mentally challenged.
you kept calling numbers in ur phone book and saying, "I love your show, I'm a long time listener, first time caller."
Is it appropriate to get drunk, stand up at the wedding and make a toast to "the time the lovely bride asked me to come on her chest"?
our generation is not ready to get married
Dude just read our convo. Apparently I was talking to you while I was naked. She wasn't happy about it.
You did a jig for the bouncer when you saw him. Just reminding you.
Apparently william has a "couch montage"...an album of facebook photos of himself on different couches in various states of happiness and despair. A heartwrenching journey through what was clearly a significant part of his life. I'd mock him more but I think the fact that I looked through it means he's already won
My vagina is not really on board with my "emotional issues"
I had a dream about masturbating with toys I can't afford.
My sex life and finances are equally in shambles.
Do me a favor? If you get with him, please lick his abs. Someone has too they're just too beautiful not to.
No, they seem attractive after SIX beers, after three they're just the gender you're looking for.
PLEASE. I won't throw up on the floor this time. Or fuck in the bathroom. Or dance on the pool table. So PLEASE.
I walked so much yesterday and I was like holy fuck I need to do some cardio apart from sex cause this is ridic
My walk of shame is starting to become positively reinforcing; I stop by Starbucks and when I leave I look someone just heading to work.
Details are irrelevant. Come bail me out of jail.
i just watched a 27 minute video about owls...that high.
Randomize
