I made my friend ***** cry when I wouldn't let her call u for an orgy at 3am...I didn't think you'd be to happy being woke up
Emee failed...She used my genitals as a tampon
I realize that when i start making 24-themed music videos in my head to the song 'love is a battlefield' that i really need to get out more
You American Chicks are so confusing....1 day you are on my nuts next day you be trippin
Dude its not just American chicks...a small penis is the same in every language
I've walk of shamed through this apartment complex so many times, I think people think I live here.
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
Just made nachos out of string cheese and sunchips and laying in my bed watching babay einstion..get on my level
Im not moving so it's going to have to be a 3 some.
Things are burning & the world smells of peanut butter. It's beautiful.
We all just did coke and we're coloring so if you're sober its pointless for you to come over here
I've found myself wondering why I WASN'T naked before, but I generally always know why I am naked. Except now. WHY THE FUCK ARE WE ALL NAKED
I almost went home with him but then my hydroxycut fell out of my purse at the bar and I ran away
Getting "I couldn't find the front door so I climbed in through window" drunk seems to be a habit of yours
After sex he brought chocolates and said he loves RuPaul's Drag Race. How many points does he score for that?
the cuervo was good, but I started with jello shots. and when i threw up a whole jello shot came out.
Randomize
