I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
he is training for a marathon but can't last more than five minutes on top. worst tuesday night ever
I couldn't even finish, she was lounder and more annoying than DJ Khaled
I am literally too baked to press the call button. How am I supposed to bone him?
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
I fed the cats at 7 am, made her eggs, gave her oral, and now I'm helping her clean and baking her brownies. Cosmos got nothing on me.
Definitely got a blow job in Charles Schwab's bed last night.
I love my job.
I don't get it. Why have babies when you can have vodka?
After this week, alcohol is mandatory.
I would rather suck a dick or two than go there
My first love was gay too, it's okay.
I don’t mind that he’s uncircumcised. It’s the fact that he talks about the Bible immediately after we have sex .
I'm with jana at walgreens picking out penis rings.... Did you know they sell vibrators at walgreens? Wtf?
I love you, but seriously, that was way too long a thesis on an Arby’s curly fry being wrapped around schlong!
Randomize
