who let me buy 6 packs of big league chew? and eat them all? thats not cool
he got up in front of the whole lecture hall and yelled that Charlie Brown's Christmas tree was his favorite book in the history of the universe. then he stumbled out the fire exit setting the alarm off. I could've jumped him right then and there.
apparently 20 random guys watched the process of me being carried on a mattress through the dorms
his profile picture is him throwing up "#1" hands after his lax championship next to his coach that i fucked....embarrasing for him, yet ironically beautiful for me.
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
Ya. I wonder how much being a beard for a major league baseball player pays. This could be a lucrative arrangement...
You kept whispering "Party Dave" every time someone would start talking.
i found out she really is a mensa member
so she was the smartest passed out on the floor hair encrusted in vomit girl at the party
My boobs love her too. She makes them feel important even though they're small
If there was a gecko involved in your BDSM I'm gonna have to request that not happen when we live together ;)
Sorry about the nipples in that snapchat. It was meant for the Australian.
WEED BROWNIES! He put weed in my brownie mix! And he got it from YYYYOOOOUUUU!
Look at the bright side mom. After 20 years dad is still capable of surprising you!
Shut up Max.
im about to go through the checkout with 3 flasks and a wedding card. let the judgement begin!
update: cashier guessed cash bar before i could say anything. completely bypassed "dry" and knew cash bar right away. i love this state.
like I'd leave you in a situation like that..pfft. what kinda friend do you think I am?
...a stoned one.
my face feels like mints and my body feels like tingles
Randomize
