Thanks again for letting me crash last nite. Sorry I banged your little brother.
wait, did i just see you litter out your window??
umm, i have a hybrid. it cancels out.
I think I'd remember a dick in my mouth
I'm wearing the bright blue sombrero all through the airport as a sign of triumph that I survived spring break. I'm getting compliments
I just heard the term negative masterbation and I don't believe it
maddie and i have invented a community puke bowl. explanation later
this is a mass text to all the people i smoke weed with. I have Mono, so if we've shared a bong/pipe. sorry man.
the girl in my class has a rolling backpack and just told it to stay. im too hungover for this.
Then, he just started shoving orange pieces in my mouth as a chaser
NO. NO LET HIS PENIS TOUCH YOU.
Also, even though this really sucks now, we will look back on this one day and laugh at the time we all got arrested on Thanksgiving
We should drive around in your Jeep on snow days and get stoned while we help random strangers stuck in the snow. So much good karma.
FUCK YOU AND YOUR WEAK ASS EYEBROWS
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
I told my mom that I was just gonna go check the mail. It's been 19 hours, and I woke up in a hot tub covered in chocolate, with a text from her sayin "have fun sweetie"
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