i think i have reached a jessica simpson level of regret
I really want to sleep with her friend. I'm hoping our casual sex relationship will somehow lead to that.
she's like bobby knight all she does is scream and point
Just realized after we're done pre-gaming for St. Patricks Day, we have March Madness, the first day of spring, and Easter to pre-game for. March is a great month.
We aren't going to mix hockey and sex texts tonight.
I totally agree. all sexting is on hold till after the games over.
Playoffs. This shit is serious.
My costume is made up of 4 inch heels and a firefighter costume I'm borrowing from the dramatic play area of my Pre-K classroom. I told you I could still be slutty on a teacher's salary.
You spent most of the night crying and throwing leftover meatballs at the neighbors dogs
We woke up, fucked twice, she drank 3 warm heinekins to cure her hangover and said "Im glad you're still hott when im sober"
Take my keys. Load me into the vehicle. Drive. Get food. Come back. These are my demands.
It's not quite a landing strip... It's more like a soul patch for my vagina.
So burnt out. Like weed hangover. And someone just fell through the ceiling outside of my class. How's your morning going?
We need to go back to the barter system so I can sell my body and just be done with it.
I'm on a treadmill at the gym ordering pizza on my phone so it'll get to my house around the time I get home. I NEED HELP. Or I'm a genius. I haven't decided.
He asked me how flexible I was and all I could think about was that time I threw my back out putting in a tampon.
It was horribly awesome. Its like looking at the sun, you know its bad for you but I just couldn't stop looking.
Randomize
