I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
the $50 fast cash from checking button should just be retitled "8th of weed"
i called her out for picking her nose in public and he still wonders why i don't like her!
just got invited to smoke a bowl by a guy who has a prostetic leg and has been on the jerry springer show multiple times. I love my life right now
he was gone before i woke up. left a pee stain, phone number, note and $20 for sheets. safe to say i will not be calling.
The salesman looked at me like I was crazy when I explained the need for a headboard that had slats so I could handcuff people to it
I honestly don't know if ill make it through the next two hours. The hangover is strong with this one.
Hey when you wake up and read this, we really need to stop pullin our dicks out when we drink dude. I have all the pics, yall are assholes
Valuable lesson learned: if you reach the point where you have to talk yourself in to finishing the last half of your beer, you shouldn't try.
I FINALLY HAVE A REASON TO DYE MY PUBES BLUE!!!
Going to jail was so much more fun than I thought it would be. I feel like I walked away with more than just a bomb-ass mugshot, I feel like I made some life long friends.
Celebratory bar crawl?
I dont' remember leaving St. Cloud, getting home, or apparently directing traffic in the middle of the fucking street while black out drunk.
Like I cant decide if he's like autistic or something or just seriously cock blocks himself on purpose with this shit
I feel like I just did it with Buster from Arrested Development. Taking a shower. #winefail
Dont care about too tired for sex, thank you for leaving your laser pointer. I have now determined both my cats are stupid.
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