Bad news: I had to be at work at 7:15. Good news: no one had used the bathroom yet so I got to defile a freshly cleaned stall
During sex she told me I could do anything I wanted to her. You remember that toy lightsaber we bought at Wal Mart?
He told us that was the only place he could get service when we found him in the closet passed out with a beer
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
he thinks im joking when i say don't visit. i mean it's summer...he was the college fuck and now it's time for the summer fuck
I bet you think you're really funny for switching my line of coke with a line of protein powder.
Wat the fuck dude ketchup in my bong???
He kept making me pretend I was his personal trainer. When I swallowed his cum he made me pretend I was drinking a protein shake. Thats actually what it tasted like.
Well it looked like you were having a fucking apiphany sitting at the toilet with a t shirt around your head
The penis is a tricky weapon to use. When using it as leverage you have to make it seem emotional. I'd rather use it as a club sometimes.
I just saw a fat girl roll down the steps taking out three people with her, thought you should know.....
It felt as if we were fucking on a sea of baby feet and morgan freemans face hair
Of course it may just be the context. A dish of dog food would look lovely next to your breasts.
Totally just railed SuperGirl for my birthday. Best Girlfriend EVER!
Normally, it will inspire me to work. Today, it's inspiring me to masturbate.
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