Are we in a gay sports bar?
so he just left - touched my cheek like he was gona kiss me and then gave me a fist bump?
just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
So the girl I hooked up with last night pretended to be from Comcast when my girlfriend stopped by this morning. She even made a fake appointment to check her internet. Best hookup ever.
well when do great stories at the expense of people's relationships become a bad thing?
the realtor just asked me if i've ever made meth on this property.... i need to do something about my hair
The maintenance guy at work just asked me out for a drink. For once, I proudly said that I was 20.
My dick is covered in produce stickers. I suspect you
You can drink as much as you want but it's not gunna make her forehead any smaller
I was hoping it might at least fix her teeth
I thought my ass was sore from the gym then I realized it was from being spanked. Confusing time in my life.
I mean with a sentence like that I knew I would be cumming
You had a fry stuck to your face... Every five mins you would wake up, take a bite, put it back then fall asleep again...
So, I gotta figure when the nurses at the emergency room noticed my new hair cut it means I'm there too often, right?
I miss your drunken presence, and strong odor of hard liquor and potent weed.
I had to remind him last night as he had his arm around me, "We hook up, we don't cuddle!"
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