Saw a guy smoking a cig holding it with a fork and driving WTF?
Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
i can't wait to kiss dudes with my vampire teeth in.
So what if i ate it off the ground. Its like i found a five dollar bill just laying there, in burrito form.
four loko is apparently banned in the us. so i think its time for us to stock up. i already emailed them about buying them in bulk
There are 3 guys sitting in the elevator in lawn chairs wearing sunglasses and holding beers. the hallway rugs are stuffed in a trash can. i've never been so glad to be sober.
I'm spending tomorrow doing taxes and making jello shots. Is this adulthood?
hi I'm Emily and I thoroughly enjoy getting minors hammered.. I'll start my AA intro just like that.
He wants to make me arch my back "like I'm having an exorcism". Not sure if I'm turned on or freaked out.
I ain't lettin her quit anyway. We don't fuck enough for her to meet the housewife requirements
Hey so I got my period
Thank god I wasn't ready to deal with sober you for 9 months
Afterwards I drank a whole bottle of cake vodka in the bathtub while he was bawling his eyes out. Hands down weirdest hookup I've ever had.
I cant miss out on a half day of work without a booty call
I woke up in my bed with candy and beer bottles all around me and i dont know where any of it came from. I love valentines day.
so i went to the bathroom and my thong was on sideways... i guess that solves the mystery
Randomize