OMG MY MOM JUST ASKED IF I WAS GETTING PAP SMEAR TOMORROW VERY LOUDLY WHILE WE ARE STANDING IN A VERY PUBLIC LINE.
In debating whether or not it's worth getting out of bed and walking 5 feet down the hallway to go to the bathroom before I puke
its taking every last moral i have not to steal this bike
you still have morals?
Well actually itd just be too hard to ride the bike with this large rake i just stole
I am intoxicated and cannot bring you a burrito. However, if you want to bring ME one...
Chinatown. Her fortune cookie said "accept the next proposition you receive." TELL ME NO NOW.
She called me in the morning crying, but I was busy cleaning up bird guts, very hungover. It was a very surreal morning.
the night ended with taco bell and tears
I defriended her. I just can't support someone whose profile picture is of their water birth.
Making a me burrito to ward off the cold...and the aloneness of my vagina
I dont' remember leaving St. Cloud, getting home, or apparently directing traffic in the middle of the fucking street while black out drunk.
I found it. now I'm going to the gym to be "healthy" or whatever that folklore is called.
I mentioned the porn thing he mentioned a brother it all kinda just came together
Nothing to be ashamed of. I bet Oprah has sharted.
Beard. Chest hair. Job.
The holy trinity.
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
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