Well, what part of "I've heard she has crabs" didn't you take into consideration?
A stripper just got mad at me for saying goddammit. She's in no position to lecture me on morality
i caught the condom in my mouth.. dont ask me how
I said make yourselves at home, not to put a used condom on my ceiling fan.
Found my phone laying in a snow angel outside my apt this morning.
I had to take the fire extinguisher from him. He was just sitting on the floor petting it.
By the way, thank you for feeding me fries when I was sitting on the floor.
Still trying to wash and scratch the glitter off of my dick. That stripper should be banned.
you're like that jamaican tarat card reading chick... only with herpes
I hate vagina strikes, but I must not stray from my path. My boyfriend will know the true meaning of blue balls.
Don't I can pass these orgasm blushes off as sunburn for much longer...
George disappeared two hours ago with a stripper named "delicious." Haven't seen him since
We literally laid down in the back of my car and had sex in a parking lot and it was in the top 3 best moral-less decisions I've made.
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
I got kicked out of the E.R. for saying "balls".
Randomize
