They should really pass out barf bags in church
There is no way he is gay with that hair.
My roommate still talks on AIM. What is this middle school?
I blacked out, started puking and peed on the guy I was hooking up with. Mid hand job.
How old are you? 14? Who gives hand jobs anymore?
Salt in an open wound right now.
She needs to learn she only fits into our friendship as a DD.
whatever. i almost had sex in a car with someone passed out in the back seat. phone's not my biggest worry.
Everybody knows the last week of summer internships include showing up to the office hammered and hitting on the CEO
they sound like some classy girls.
Hey, I don't give them daddy issues, I just take advantage of it. The real bad guy here is American parenting.
The gay is strong with you! You're more concerned about my outfit than my safety.
I just want to let you know how hung over I am today and I fucked a girl in a kangaroo costume last night.
I have no idea. But I feel like I could climb a mountain and then have sex on it.
I rolled joints beforehand. Lit a candle. Ghetto rigged taping the 40's on my hands and then lit the joint using the flame of the candle.
I'm so proud of your modern ingenuity
I have this vague feeling that I was involved in a dance off with a homeless man?
Plus you need some new dick in your life, the environment is fucked enough you donโt have to recycle anymore ๐๐
I woke up with pitch black feet and crushed doritos around my mouth. That's how I determined how my night went
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