I wasn't pimping you out... I was helping you network!
White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
Just witnessed a fat girl fall off the treadmill, pop a medicine ball, and drink coke out of a water bottle all in one workout.
All of a sudden i love everyone. In all their flawed and failing beauty. This is pretty good weed.
Mm. I just want to eat pancakes off of his fine ass.
This hurricane better not stop me from sitting on the stoop thurs & enjoying all the slutty costume walkofshamers
Can you get the drug form of snow for the blizzard this weekend?
I'm making poor life decisions again. Tune in tomorrow to see how much I hate life.
I didn't want to see any of his nipples and now I've seen all three. Thanks.
Ended up in his bed... He's passed out holding me and his bulldog is laying across my legs. Both snoring. HELP!! I wanna go home!
I am high playing guitar hero naked. Please don't let me die this way
As I took my shirt off he commented on how great my boobs where. I responded with "thanks, I grew them myself"
Btw. I have a sinus infection from doing cocaine in a portapotty at a Duran Duran concert. So, gimme a couple of days before y'all start the party.
Blow Jobs and the Patriots Playing I think I’m going to marry her
How drunk were you? in an effort to seduce him, you demonstrated your lap dance skillz on his dog.
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