Yeah. I hotboxed a windbreaker.
I'm watching Cheaper By The Dozen. I almost forgot that Hilary Duff was a really shitty actor before she was a really shitty singer.
I wish guys would just cum water 'cause you don't have to worry about being pregnant and it'd be like a squirt gun fight
she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
Also, hurry up because I don't like drinking alone. I'm still doing it, but I don't like it.
you tried to fill your inhaler with vodka
the fat guy in me is very excited, and the skinny guy in me is very excited for the fat guy in me
But think about it. I could put her gold medal around my penis
we were making out in my truck and while she was straddling me she informs me that she jerks off horses for a living. Should I be concerned or flattered?
pray to the hookup gods
Okay first of all, that is a sick ass nickname please call me that forever. Second, i need your help.
WELL I DIDNT KNOW IT WAS POSSIBLE TO COME SO HARD YOU HAVE AN ASTHMA ATTACK BUT HERE I AM
I think it may be easier if I stay drunk/high til the wedding. You game?
They have one of those claw machines here... with a dildo in it...
Randomize
