Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
You should really figure out how to get me a picture that will pop up on my phone when you call
Just upload a picture of Bea Arthur. That's what my soul looks like these days
I had a dream last night that I was the one that killed Biggie
You're so easy to please, it's adorable. Like an alcoholic puppy.
how many americans can say they have been laid before eating their first big mac?
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
She found 60 bucks at the strip club. Its probabably been in a vagina but really most money probably has
I don't know what to tell you, usually I would just ask if they'd like to meet the captain. If you can't get laid it's your problem.
We passed out in his car so I had to find a way to inconspiciously make my walk of shame back inside to go get my shit. To make things more difficult I had no pants and the whole neighborhood was awake
She followed me back, then proceeded to find my room, get her panda suit on? And then raid my room and pass out on my couch... what the fack do I do now?!?!
I haven't had to masterbate since I started dating him over a year ago. I don't even know if I remember how and my vagina is calling.
We are no longer allowed to make spur of the moment decisions about our love lives
ABSOLUTELY NOT
im gonna shove his purity ring down his throat
ALL I WANT IS SEMEN IN/ON/AROUND MY BODY. WHY IS HE MAKING THIS SO HARD.
He was gone when I woke up. But he left skid marks on my sheets and our unopened bottle of Titos is missing
New Rule: No more sleepovers with guys we met on Reddit
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