Christians are straight up FREAKS
did you get engaged???
I'm good, just tired from chardonnay and giving hand jobs.
No matter how fun it seemed the night before you will always regret taking those pictures, you will always regret eating as much as you did, but you will never regret the great lengths you had to got to get those bruises.
He's pole dancing on a heat lamp.
Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
I gave an inspirational speech to a bum and called a bride ugly at her wedding reception.
Incoming: this is a booty call. To accept, please reply with an appropriate time. To reject, please reply "N" and the information will be filed for future reference.
I knew it would be an interesting night when he showed up at my house on a scooter wearing a six foot american flag as a cape.
I've literally never felt worse
My body feels like its decomposing
I had a sex dream. With two guys. And my subconscious decided to put your dick on BOTH OF THEM. If there is a society where that does not mean "I cherish you" I do not want to live there.
My aunt comes over, haven't seen her in 4 years. First thing, looks me up and down and goes "...yup, that pair ripened nicely. Theyll get you some free drinks"
I think you were raised by the wrong sister
oh my god I have a fantastic druncle story to tell you. It involves a burrito, a meltdown and a bear
The burrito and meltdown are standard, but I'm intrigued by the bear
How do u ask ur friend if shes keeping her kid but in a chill way
Randomize
