I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
She said she didn't have time to shave "there"
Then she shouldn't have had time to order the lobster.
she said she missed her period, but is going to six flags... think im safe?
And if you don't call me, I will embarrass you publicly with a can of spray cheez.
just had sex with a midget and didnt wrap it... were totally gonna have a tv show :)
We tried having a conversation with our noses.
Seriously-without actually meaning the statement for it's words- that made me want to put a baby in you.
I have managed to reach the 'after meth poster look' before lunch here...
OH MY GOD IT'S LIKE SHOOTING FISH IN A BARREL, EXCEPT INSTEAD OF FISH THEY ARE FIGHTER PILOTS
Will it make you feel better if we wear the title of dysfunctional fucking roommates? It requires monogamy unless we want to bang someone together.
Well the other day she asked me how often I jerk off. So I guess things are getting semi-serious
he's just got his life so together and it makes my pussy wet.
Just fantasized about my boss's fingers in a meeting. I desperately need to get some.
I'M IN A SPINNING VORTEX OF SELF-HATRED AND HORNINESS
It's a testament to the kinds of spouses/parents we will be that we get so wasted but still show up to every class on time. We honor our commitments bitches!
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