i was just lookin through my fb pics and i think im with a cat in like 40% of them..: how sad is my life
i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
You brought back some girl with you at 3am and introduced her to everyone as "hot pocket"
one of the cashiers from Kroger is eating at my kitchen table and nobody knows why.
I just want one of her status not to be about Jesus.
So i realized that if i bought everything from my google search history for the past week i would have a dolphin, a wolf costume, a unicorn costume, a katana and a bullet proof vest. Not sure how the dolphin would fit in but the rest of it would end up in one awesome night or someone would die. Either way i say we do it.
I ate vegetarian today, so I deserve a beer.That's my justification.
It's like you're the voice of my soul.
Did you really get up in the middle of a tattoo to go get Taco Bell?
I'm coming right back.
Hey are you going to the pride parade? If so get me a shit ton of condoms
who was i chillin with last night? i woke up in a storage unit
I wish I knew the extent of my injuries before I climbed over the fence. Might have avoided the need to purchase a cupholder for my wheelchair.
No it's like. I don't respect you. And I think you're a terrible person but. I still wanna bone it out.
Acid king. Jackson puked a lot. Promoter booth. Angry security. No acid. Probably a good thing.
Jungle juice breakfast? No? Ok.
last night I used snow as a chaser
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