Yelling drunk tank or bust at a cop, not a good idea
I just ate a can of beans for dinner so I can afford to go get a 5$ bottle of wine. I really did not think these choices would still be necessary at age 25.
The girl that works the front desk at my gym invited me and my friend to come see her Tuesday during her shift at hooters because its her birthday. I still have a boner
The guy who bit me so hard two nights ago that I had to put Neosporin on my nipple and the guy in my bed right now are two different people. Help
Totally. Bang on. He'll be fine. He might cry into your perfect tits once in a while, but that's the price ya pay.
I sang "A Whole New World" while I took his virginity
That is awesome that you did that.
i got kicked out of McDonald's for demanding a margarita mcflurry
I have poison ivy and a broken finger. Don't have a threesome in the woods.
His crazy is a thing to be cherished
I'm trying to find some better sex background music so his neighbors don't hate us. This is tedious.
Dicks are not precious.
All she said to me before going to get another shot was "Damn, I'd eat her out."
Every time we have sex, I feel his dick ramming my soul into submission. Problem is..... I LIKE THAT SHIT!
Oh yeah, you are a real peach except for shitting uncontrollably and bleeding out of your face.
Nice. Ask if they watched saved by the bell. yes=legal. No=jailbait
Randomize
