I don't think brook has ever known best
I'm in love with you.
huh?
Don't be nervous. I'm just saying - if you had a dick, I'd suck it.
then she woke up from sleeping for an hour and the first thing she said was "i regret it already"
My balls had bee stings let's just leave it at that.
he just flipped me off the bed, said "deal with it", and came on me.
I like to think of you as more a magic eight ball of my life's journey?
I could run a drunk marathon in heels
What is your life?
A tangled mess of finals and bad decisions.
We had sex on a lawn chair while fireworks were going off last night. It was unavoidable that I got mosquito bites all over my ass
someone needs to name a hurricane after you
I didn't want to see any of his nipples and now I've seen all three. Thanks.
There's a dude wearing a banana suit at the house across the street....
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
I probably should have told her I was actually the drunkest one there before she let me pierce her ear
I couldn't find my contact solution so I thought mixing toothpaste and water would work
Randomize
