I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
i'm waiting for the less fat version of him to text me
Just found the bucket list I wrote when I was high...somehow I dont think "jello swimming pool" is gonna happen.
I think your going to be the cause of an awesome death
Homeboy was juggling while taking bong rips. Of course he got laid.
Just did coke off of a cross necklace and am headed to the strip club. Happy Easter!
Why is there no Netflix category for "I just wanna cry, but I don't have time for a whole romcom"?
You seriously don't remember crying about how much you miss your mom right before we hooked up?
Wow. Ok who would waste Game 7 ticket on kids?!
Poor parenting at its best
I passed up getting laid last night. It's almost been a YEAR - what the Hell was I thinking, being so choosy??
I haven't listened to news as I've been having lesbian sex all night. Anything new?
So there i was right, midnight, washing my junk off in my bathroom sink.
I'm waiting for you in a manthong right now.
My sister gave me satin sheets. We can fuck on satin sheets.
So. Much. Porn.
Randomize
