He keeps looking? I tried to shag. I invited him to this table but he went to ze other one! If he shaves his 'tache I would totally hit it.
I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
Just got back from doctors appt. He lied. It wasn't a pimple on his dick.
My balls had bee stings let's just leave it at that.
My therapist told me it was ok for me to "take risks" now. Cue the hookers and blow.
He woke up licked his hand and put it on my vag and went back to sleep. This is twice this week and its only wednesday
GOING OUT OF BUSINESS: we're having a foreclosure party tonight...We'll also be raffling off a washer/dryer, microwave and a white tiger head.
I didn't think it was possible, but that girl next door is even louder when drunk.
He somehow managed to bang-mail me last night. I woke up this morning to a voicemail from 1:54 a.m. of moaning and screaming. I now know how talented he is and how annoying I am to have sex with.
No, we will not be going out tonight. We are trying to grow the toy donkey in whiskey rather than water. Serious fucking science. Have fun at the boring bar while we Bill Nye it up in this bitch.
Based off the amount of cat hair on my poncho....i stole a cat last night.
my vagina hasn't met your boyfriend yet ... makes me sad
Hows your mom
Shes good, she claims she wasnt drunk
i think i just naturally attract stoners
Randomize
