I asked him where the store BJ's was and he unzipped his pants.
Why do I feel like I used to feel when I almost got caught looking at porn when I get caught looking at facebook at work
I have on cowboy boots and a ten gallon hat. I'd say I'm a little past tipsy
I got a black eye last night. This guy said for every 35 pounds you lose you gain an inch to your dick. I asked him how long he has been peeing sitting down.
he just came in and straightened the chair and left again
yeah, but the first step is admitting you have a problem, the next step is kidnapping him
I know I'm not the first to fuck in a park but i deserve props for doing it at 3pm. On a sunny day might I add.
I just found the gloves and lightbulb I stole. Did you pee on a ATM inside a bank?
woke up wearing a canadian flag with the starting forward of the hockey team. i feel oddly patriotic
I respect the size of her balls.
Yeah but I don't respect the size of her anything else.
I actually bought food at McDonald's as an apology for what I was about to do to their bathroom.
He said I gave him the best head he's ever had and I bowed. I BOWED.
Do you know how hard it is to give a bj in your dead grandmothers car
Just once I'd like to go out and not have to tell you to put your pants back on.
you know you're sexually deprived when you're holding a warm taquito in your hand and your vagina starts to tingle
Randomize