Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
guys i just found a dildo in the laundry room and its purple
whats a dildo? isnt that like a fancy piece of bread?
you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
STOP fucking him and come play in the snow with us!
his dick is like his red hair, amazing but useless
I'm drinking a margarita out of my 'best bj' trophy and it tastes like victory.
i know im back at school when i can poke any random spot on my body and expect a 80% chance that theres a bruise there
Grandma just handed out bail money... it's officially christmas
At least I'm doing lines with a notecard. That counts for something right
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
Drunkenly making hamburger helper. I just whispered "I can't wait to have you in my mouth."
You can't just be this socially awkward and sexually frustrated and jealous as a fucking demon and be expected to stay sober.
Well at least I still have a burrito in my pocket.
He is such a generous lover, I can look past the fact his name is fucking Bob.
I brought an already opened bag of trail mix from home to snack on today. Some motherfucker ate all the m&ms out of it. I hate my roommates
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