so after all day drinking, we went to an all u can eat crab place and i was going from table to table surveying the crowd if they though the crab i was carrying around looked like the flying dog from never ending story...what the hell is wrong with me?
Dude. Creed is coming in september.
We're no longer friends.
I'm more impressed with the spaghetti smoothie at the present moment.
He was ugly. Like horse ugly. But he was built for power, not for speed.
There's a skull full of vodka. How bad can it be?
In fairness it was pretty good sex, but I still wasn't expecting the mass cheering and applause he got on leaving my tent
he is allergic to cats. we can only glue dog hair on him. otherwise he might die and i dont want to be responsible for that.
ahaha ok
let's call it "werewolfing"
if I open my eyes, my head will explode. that hungover.
official rule: if your drunk, it doesn't count
then nothing in my life counts
I've never seen a guy eye-fuck someone so hard in my entire life. I thought he would develop laser vision, bore holes into your body, and not even realize your innards would be spilling everywhere. That's how bad it was.
WAKE UP!!! We have 20 minutes to get to class. That means we only have 10 minutes to get drunk.
I think Saturday night will always be a mystery to me, except for buying an excessive amount of birthday shots for everyone and yelling BIRTHDAY SHOTS before every shot.
It's 1:26 and I have already found 5 fruit flies between 3 separate glasses of wine. This is supposed to be a summer problem. Fucking global warming.
I'm that daughter that had to send her mother "DON'T GET SHITFACED" & yes, in ALL CAPS.
There's a random table in the kitchen...and it's not the kitchen table...we don't know where it came from
Randomize
