Sweet. Might not hurt to poop on the floor anyway.
Do NOT cum in me, on me, or in my bed.
the day after is always just damage control
Bring your kids so they can distract our kids so we can drink beer in peace.
I'm not sure if it was sex or spear fishing. He goes in for it like he's crash landing a rocket
I think I was using my hair to catch my vomit last night.
You were.
Well for starters, her tits were hairy.
Stop making Mac and cheese and sit on his face. FINISH HIM
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
It turns out my English teacher used to pose for Playboy. She's an inspiration.
i think im in europe. pls send help
Drunk text the hot guy two doors down confessing my love for him.... He gave me a thank you card today.
There is blood all over my sheets and no discernible source.
No you just wanted to pass out in your hallway because your room was too far away
Thanks for loaning me your shower and panties. My hubby is awesome, but I shouldn’t go home commando, smelling like lube and sperm again
Randomize
