ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
how do flat chested girls get laid?
He said "ride me pocahontas" while I was on top of him last night
Dont worry about the blood on the pillow. its from my face.
I met her dad while holding 4 empty beer bottles at the opera house. I think I made a hell of an impression.
Bisexual Viking-cowboy hybrid is at the bar again
Dibsssss
I called her 20 times. Apparently she went home to do MORE shots before bed. Didnt miss me until this morning. WHO FORGETS THEIR HIGHSCHOOL SISTER AT A FRAT?
I'm considering offering a class on how to find good porn.
I found my limit. I will not, in fact, blow my 78 year old professor for an A in his class.
Actually here it's more "lie around naked in a dark room" weather.
... and smoked a joint with my new landlord. I'm starting to like Germany.
I finished masturbating now I'm eating french toast crunch. What is life, and what are friends.
not only did u rap a voicemail to me last night.... but it lasted so long that it cut you off so you called back to finish..... never do this again
I don't know whether to cheer for the free bourbon, or cry from the screaming children.
What conversation warrents "penis" in rainbow comic sans
Randomize
