Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
Watching that soccer game was like getting kicked in the crotch for an hour and half and then coming right at the end.
We talked about all of the sex positions that would better allow him to feed me grapes. I think I'm in love.
I wish I could go back in time 3 years and tell my freshman self how easy it is to hook up with freshmen
You sat on my knee, like Santa, while I peed.
Basically, what i'm trying to say is, if you don't have something, excuse or gift, to satisfy my anger i am going to look you in the eye and piss on the floor.
But break dance skills will only take you so far
All those movies are bullshit, there is no way to run down a line of parked cars, they`re too far apart. my faces hurts so much right now
body shots are frowned upon at family weddings. i'll keep that in mind next time. maybe.
No one parties "Full Karen". She once broke a couple up at the bar, ate the girl out in the bathroom and took the guy home.
sweet sixteen by hillary duff just came on and i feel like i let lizzie mcguire down for being such a stoner
He made a toga out of my hot pink bed sheets and cracked an egg on his head. Then he proceeded to alphabetize our DVD collection, which was impressive because I'm 99% sure he couldn't have done that sober.
The sex definitely would have been a perk. But not sitting in a ditch was what I was going for...
This chick walked up to me in the bar and started making out with me, then grabbed my drink while I wasn't looking and walked off.
Oh god. Charles just fell off the bar. Didn't spill his drink. He's come so far..
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