you dont know how to answer ppls txts anymore?!?
im sorry, i don't get text messages.
reasons why jon gosselin is probably ur biological father: 1. ur half asian 2. hes everyones biological father 3. u wear ed hardy
sounds legit
Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
if you ever come into my room screaming for me to set up rockband at 4:45 am ever again i will kill you
Im watching someone hooking up in the library
procrastination at its finest
the snow is so cold on my vagina.
why do you have snow on your vagina?
vodka and heels.
I tried ok? my penis just doesnt like her as much as my mother does
Drunken horseback riding is the absolute worst decision i've ever made in my life.
and thats when we got a drunken mammogram in the middle of cvs pharmacy
After the concert, I paid a cab to drive me around the city so I could shout "dc highfive!" at everyone who passed for an hour and a half.
The word cocktail makes me want to rip my liver out and nail it to a cross.
he just kept texting even after we lit his shoelaces on fire. he just calmly walked into the pool... still texting.
There's a guy running dressed as a bunny toward your house.
Today I learned that I have a bigger dick than Draymond Green
It's so Britney 2007, you know?
Randomize