that's when I learned why R Kelly peed on that bitch
Just tried calling my phone on my phone because i thought i lost my phone.
why cant girls ever use the fly? why do they always have to awkwardly try to pull it over your belt?
Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
Either I'm a lot drunker than I thought, or he has three dicks....
I think I'm gonna have to go with the first one...
She's either too fat to type, hammered or has terrible spelling.
So how exactly do I backtrack from motorboating and ass grabbing?
Apparently hitting a bong with your mouth half numb is hilarious but frustrating!
Would you like to get an apartment bong? It can be like our pet and we can give it a name.
Eh. Fuck him. He's missing out. I'm legit naked and drinking straight from the bottle of wine.
I took a pregnancy test at Pancheros a bit ago.
So TMI but just realizing I have not masturbated since trump took office. He's sucked the sex drive out of me.
I will find, mount, and marry that person.
I think it stinks she’s cheating on him. My vagina on the other hand is tingly thinking about a summer of sexual healing
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