At least we don't have one night stands
True that. We sink our claws in our men.
GUESS WHAT I JUST LICKED
I feel like half our conversations start this way.
Leave Me Alone
At least least me cry on your voice mail
I forgot it was 4/20. that COMPLETELY explains the 7/11. i was like "that's a lot of white dudes... and they're really into snacking."
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
So much for not drinking this week after this weekend.. Congratulations. U made it until tuesday.
She kept sniffing my sweater and tried to guess what type of detergent I use.
We have to have sex twice when i get back. I miss you sex, and thank god the nhl lockout is over sex. I will happily let you wear your sharks jersey during it and i will wear my ducks jersey, and it will be mad rivalry sex.
How do you respond to a booty call from yesterday?
My gut feeling that we had reached a new level of intimacy last night was confirmed early this morning when you sleep farted on penis.
she stole my Timberlands and my Sublime shirt and left her heels and bra. this is war
i need to put some appletini on your dick
I HAVE PIZZA MONEY AT ALL TIMES IT'S CALL EMERGENCY PLANNING
We should probably start extreme couponing for the morning after pill.
whoever decided snowing in 90 percent of campus on a night when the streets are flowing with tequila and skittles was clearly not an R.A.
Randomize