***** fucked a guy with one hand last night
OK...I gotta go get strawberry short cake cakes and knee pads
I was cleaning up my drunken mess and I found my ID in a cereal box
I just finished washing your number off of my chest. I'm Bryan by the way.
She was kinda tragic... like a puppy that runs into things. Cute but really stupid. So, yeah, I hit it.
He is drunk texting me begging me not to tell my mom. Pretty sure he is about to offer me sexual favors for keeping my mouth shut. I love being the boss's daughter.
she screamed"i told you already! counter clockwise spiral and the clockwise spiral!!" right in the middle of sex
wow, i never thought dating a choreographer would be so harsh
We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
Guys, right now i need a picture of a squirrel, preferably with one of you guys but not necessary.
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
I swear with his long flowing hair and god-like body he looked like Jesus, a bong hitting Jesus
You know what, don't even answer. Just promise me you'll go to the Corner of Shame when you get home.
Happy Birhtday!
Dad, it's 3am and it's not my birthday... wherever you are, go home
I mean we don't talk anymore but I still see him around wearing that sweater he stole from me after we had sex
How do you politely tell a guy that you only kissed him so he would shut the fuck up?
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