I just heard a teenager say to his friend "dats my baby! i was hittin her up on myspace like gurllll. she got me steamin". must have missed the memo its 2005 and we still use myspace.
He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
i dont feel like going...you don't know how much work goes into getting my whore on
You wouldn't know anything about the tooth on ice in my freezer would you?
Nothing is more awkward than taking a dump while someone is crying in the bathroom.
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
I'm just glad you're the only person I can have a "remember when we thought I was pregnant" conversation with.
I fucking give up. OKC is where small penises go to disappoint me.
I woke up in my own bed clutching a key to a Ramada in another state.
I found your doppelganger. same hair, eyes, personality, catch phrases, and penis. it was mind-boggeling.
See,its just the last time this situation happened I ended up hiding in a closet on my birthday
how does spending your day off taking me to the hospital sound?
I will go to bed dreaming of sexy Olympians carting me on a throne to the beach where they feed me pizza and champaign and massage my head/wash it like the hair dresser does.
I'm pretty sure I smell like alcoholism and shame. And it's not a pretty scent.
you were making out with a girl because you told her you were part of Nsync
Randomize
