i wish i could watch tv and lissten to music at the same time...but still understand both
i think otters can do that
Bad news is he broke up with me via text message
But the good news is I've returned as mayor of whoreville
I got an MIP via FUCKING HELICOPTER. Tuscaloosa police either have nothing to do or too many resources.
My last memory involves me naked in a mens's bathroom stall. I really hope my date was with me.
Just hit a cone using a lit sparkler. Tastes like I might die but it was magical.
Omg he's telling my parents stories about him doing jaagerbombs ... Lord help me
All I want is tacobeell and your body
that's my favorite sentence you've ever said.
I stole something. Which direction out are you guys gonna go
not now. havin a heart to heart with drunk fred flinstone
A lumberjack bearing the gift of small oranges or gymnast sex... I love you man but you lose that battle 9 out of 10
It doesn't feel like real life when you open your hotel room door and the first person you see is wearing a rabbit costume. I'm too hungover for this.
Look, sometimes you have to snapchat a topless photo of yourself in the middle of class just to prove you can. I can and I did. End of argument.
Just saw a man in a motorized chair roll by drinking a beer. It's 9:45 AM. I love Louisiana.
Nothing to be ashamed of. I bet Oprah has sharted.
you've already made the comitment to pee in public you should at least whip your dick out
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