God I can't wait to have my phone textbombed every night
Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
I just saw the nastiest chick.
Where?
woke up next to her... fuck you jack daniels, fuck you
Very hungover, bought a newspaper and found my shorts from last night in the machine.
Puking green right now......... jaimison mcflurry very bad idea
One minute we were getting noise complainted by the security guards the next I was shotgunning a beer with them
All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
He's going to let me keep his bowl in my car. Does that make us Facebook official?
The only times girls talk to me at clubs is when they're asking if I'm okay when I'm puking outside. Or if it's a tranny
A thong just fell out of my purse in front of my whole class maybe I should stop using this morning class as my walk of shame
The last time I saw her someone was carrying her on a bike and she was yelling that she was E.T.
He's my favorite late night booty call. He lives next to a Wendy's.
Is talking to an iron man poster a good or bad indicator that you've been drinking too much?
I’m going to cut back. New Year, New Me
I would never wish less dick on anyone but do what you gotta do
I'm a shining star this evening. Dancing with a cane in rite aid now. I should be kept under survaillance.
Randomize
