I chugged a bottle of robotussein and i ducking saw a blind lady on a purch sewing a shirt! And a tree portal
Passed out on a playground for a while before trying to break into the elementary school. Erica thought her captain tasted like cat food, so she poured her bottle into her cat's dish and proceeded to eat it like cereal.
You win. Erica always eats cat food.
it's like iHOP with fire
we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
at russian wedding, no open bar. bottles of vodka at table. getting to work tomorrow may be an issue.
now I know why they wanted me to come. apparently gay guys are stripper magnets
My glasses smell like tequila. I just put them on and almost threw up.
Somehow me showing up to/breaking into her house only to find I was a week early for the party became a night of weed cookies and sex.
Balls are being tripped. Said meow to my cat and he said yeah cool dude.
Neil John just started open mouth kissing everyone to make sure they are safe.
After we had sex he made me watch a Top Gun highlight video...
The golf course isn't that incognito for sex.
Oh I'm sorry does your girlfriend send you better pictures of things in her ass? No? Didn't think so. Remember that the next time you wanna complain how I don't make the first move enough.
When Dad gets to your house, ask him about the sound of anal beads. Happy Thanksgiving!
Nice people suck dick too. I'm proof.
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