super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
Woke up to a denim duvet cover this morning... why r guys so tacky?
so he came on my face and then proceeded to say "that was just how i imagined it would happen"
where do you find these guys?
operation have a gay friend backfired
I think forcing your little sister to drink with you on a Wednesday when she has school the next day is the low point of alcoholism.
She carries a brick in her purse. I wouldn't get in a fight with her
Ok fine. Wild. Free. Like a stallion set free in a beautiful meadow filled with flowers and sexy lady horses
we came up with a wnba drinking game. take a shot every play that you could've done better. won't make it through 1st quartar
Im having a christmas reunion party tonight. Last year i ate my own contact. We'll see how this year goes
The heart of my unhappiness in my job is that it's not a place where coworkers and I can draw dicks on everything to amuse each other
Omg just had weirdest best cab advice situation ever. I kissed the cabbies hand as I was leaving like he was the pope and cried
MY BRAIN IS OSCILLATING. DOES THAT EVEN MAKE SENSE
Either that or he's gagged in a strangers trunk right now.
Well I suppose either way he's learning a pretty tough lesson right now.
I mean I faked it but he could answer my texts
Have you heard yourself have sex?
I'm not THAT loud...
My neighbors filed a noise complaint.
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