no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
eh.. i should've known it was headed downhill after he used the phrase "pussy sundae"
Thats my favorite, when ex girlfriends become XL ex girlfriends
I told myself this year would be different, I wouldn't get "pee in a fish tank drunk".. Got to the girls house... Fish tank in her room.. 2 years in a row.. had to keep the tradition going
I remember seeing his penis I just dont know exactly what I did with it
He asked me to hum the Ghost Busters theme song as I was going down on him
I ran into my boss at the liquor store on our lunch hour we both just stood there awkwardly until i was like your car bar or mine hahaha we both need a cab
Just set up my first threesome: a rapper and a Marine. Pretty sure at least 80% of girls in America hate me right now.
Dude. I've never been with a guy who just wanted to go down on me all the time including while I'm shooting zombies on call of duty. My life is complete.
I did not appreciate your texts about spanking at 3'o'clock this morning.
She got engaged last night. I don't think you should ask her out man.
I have to make calls today at work. So I'm gonna call your phone and leave some random messages. Just delete them.
and that's when you shouted "ahh motherland" as you streaked down hall 4B
this morning's inventory: a top hat, two empty bottles of everclear, half a slim jim, cigars, tiara, pot necklace, and some fishnets. and that's just my purse.
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
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