Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
sorry i'm running a bit late. had to shave my brittney...was looking more like rapunzel. clearly i've been having a drought.
my mom walked in on me smoking weed alone, listening to the eagles, and just staring at the river. she totally knew.
There's nothing I can say to make me pepper spraying you any better
I just remembered how awesome your handjobs were in 7th grade, you were a true champ, thank you
You're a disgrace to the female race and the love triangle and halloween.
He looks like he got hit by a weed-eater with chlamydia
after I lost so many games of beer pong they made me be a troll, I sat under the table and told riddles while retrieving balls.
You told me that they girl who was giving you a handjob under the table looked a little like your sister
Dude I just saw a beer truck w taps in the side... It's like god heard my prayers and sent me a gift from heaven
So last night took an interesting turn.. Never thought I'd say I had to pick up my glasses off the floor of a strip club
Your dog took my vibrator out to the yard
That's not "anything", that's you deep throating a mozzarella stick.
I have alotted at least an hour for ugly crying.
We were trying to organize all the customers to hold a window pickle race. as of 10:37 pm last night we are no longer allowed in our McDonalds.
Randomize
