Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
Doing tuck and rolls down a stair case was not my brightest idea
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
I think showering with 5 people and a half gallon of vodka was one of the best decisions we have ever made.
You are the only one who would stop a bum, tell him to open up, then pour straight vodka in his mouth. You made his year.
He said that he didn't know what level the sun was on, and then he puked.
I'm thinking about wearing a strap-on just to freak him out the next time he pulls my pants off.
The last text I sent him was about nachos. Frankly, if he can't respond positively to that he can fuck off...
I would say I'm the man in the relationship but I'm cuddled on the couch eating cake mix and water.
Just got a nosebleed, my period and the runs all at the same time. I'm either dying, or this is the first sign of the apocalypse. You warning you in case it's the latter.
Occasionally I curse my inner 15 year old when I'm fulfilling their dreams as a slut, but I roll with it.
I woke up without my clothes on covered up with a towel on the floor because for some reason I took a bath in my clothes at 2am.
His encouragement of my recreational drug use is the backbone of our nonrelationship. That, and rough animal sex and loud music.
I'm not the kind of girl that sleeps with someone else's boyfriend. But I'm getting waxed just in case I change my mind...
You know you've hit a new slutty low when you're simultaneously sexting and having a tea party with a 4 year old
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