Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
well, atleast the road to alcoholism is fun.
Hey. I found $5 in quarters from one of those state quarter collection books. I'm using it for food tomorrow.
She stopped mid-blowjob to introduce herself to us
U shoulda just taken her to a stall and banged her and let me watch the game. Some friend u r.
Ah shit... I sleep-ate chocolate pudding again.
Yeah he gave the rest of the brownies to the bouncer that took his fake
I'm two sheets to the sexual wind
Ask her if it hurt when she broke through earths crust as she ascended from hell
I had an epiphany. If a dude dressed up as Batman to ask me out, I'd prolly marry him.
put something nutritious in your body. AND NOT JUST THAT JOINT.
I told him to send me a dick snap for my birthday. To personalize it, he drew a candle coming out of the tip of it so I could blow it out.
So there is a 50% chance that he just left my house and a 100% chance that I have to be up for work in 2 hours...
Is it weird to invite your FWB to thanksgiving dinner??
Randomize
