Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
my dad told me i had to spend my money wisely..so i spent the money he gave me for a desk chair on weed. ill be so high i wont even notice its gone
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
It was romantic. He brought over a bottle of Jack to celebrate us becoming official on Facebook. Definitely a story for the grandkids.
Guess whose mug shot is NOT on the Internet anymore?!?!
I'm 25 and she is 19. She wants to practice blowjobs on me because of my stamina. Not only does the GI bill pay for me to go to school I am teaching a freshman blowjob course. I love Texas.
He asked me to hum the Ghost Busters theme song as I was going down on him
my vagina hasn't met your boyfriend yet ... makes me sad
Boss out of town. Had 2 beers for lunch, a long walk and a bowl...and then in he comes. Blamed obvious intoxication on my pain meds. Back at the bar. This is one of those bad judgement days.
Chick in the reindeer getup puked on Baby Jesus last night. But then she bought us all empanadas so she's cool.
being serenaded is actually kind of awkward 2/10 do not reccommend
Like what? And no, shrooms cannot be party favors.
Why is there never any toilet paper at his apartment? What does he wipe his ass with? WHAT DOES HE WIPE IT WITH?!?
You realized your blanket was a snuggie, spread your arms, and yelled "tonight I sleep like jesus!"
She really wants to hug you. With her vagina.
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