idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
OMG I just tried to text you something dirty but accidentally texted the obama campaign
He's the equivalent of a body pillow and a dildo. But still funny. We have good pillow talk.
I woke on the floor next to a big TV. Apparently I traded my bed for a 52 inch samsung and a box of pop tarts.
I have just two goals for this NYE. 1) get so drunk that every guy looks like Clive Owen 2) make out with as many Clive's as possible.
We have to have sex while I'm dressed as a tiger. It's one of my life goals
You played a drinking game to fat people crying. It's a long climb to the moral high ground, why bother?
Ughhhh. Finnnneeeeee. I'll have sex with your brother. Sheesh. The things I do for you woman.
I almost spit out my drink. But only almost, because it was vodka. And you don't spit out vodka.
Well that's my green light to bang ur brother. Its not real til its on fb
It's that whole "half Japanese, half asshole" thing. My brother and I have found that people really go for that
debating what would be more effort, turning on to my other side or trying to get myself off with my left hand. that kind of lazy day.
I passed up getting laid last night. It's almost been a YEAR - what the Hell was I thinking, being so choosy??
Tequila shots and throwing it at a bell.
This is dumb. I'll keep doing it.
How is there a hawk inside this house? More importantly how the hell is he handling it without any gear?
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