I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
remind me not buy ky at kmart ever again. Had to get a manager to open the locked case. then he stood there and watched me look through the selection
I hate that ur telling me this.
and I was crying with the towel lady in the bathroom of the bar about the tragedy in Haiti. Then we hugged before I left and I gave her 10 dollars.
I remember saying "sorry" to the blunt before throwing it out the window
he's like a stage 5 clinger and he won't even fuck me. he has to be gay. my personality isn't really THAT great.
Apparently I was trying to convince him Springsteen has had buttsex. I ended the argument with "I bet he came from it too."
Pizza delivery...for when you need to eat your feelings for the sex you aren't having
You better buy her a motherfucking bunnyrabit to make up for this. And me footsie pajamas for being a cockblock.
Abort mission; I repeat: Abort mission.I found an attractive one.
It's like sleep walking but with blowjobs
I just want to smoke weed and be the little spoon all winter. My modern day hibernation.
rock bottom is drinking straight vodka from a protein shaker, singing one direction and crying alone in your room. exams.
He's a college graduate, has an excellent job, and respects his family. To say nothing of his 8.5 inch cock. His narcolepsy not withstanding...I'm marrying this motherfucker.
She woke up, mumbled "the trees" When i asked her what about them, she yelled "WE NEED THEM FOR OXYGEN," Then went back to sleep.
We need to get on her level.
And the you walked in and said to the only under age dude "IM NOT SLEEPING WITH YOU TONIGHT!!!" You may not have high standards but thanks for not sleeping with my brother!
Randomize
