He introduced her to the DMA meeting by saying: in the past few years i've never seen someone work so hard for so little success
Ninja stars and alcohol are a bad combo
I was just like staring at the lawn boy while singing "You Belong With Me".
I am the king of creep.
I've officially decided that whoever created hate sex should be on my christmas card list.
I just celebrated my ex boyfriends birthday by having more sex than he will today.
I have discovered that there is nothing that a giant penis attached to a southern accent can't talk me into. yee-haw!
The last thing I remember is your grandma calling me a pussy and taking my shot for me. Your family is awesome.
I really want to lead this Amish guy into temptation
So, I'm playing the Doctor Who drinking game with my dogs, but they don't understand quite when to drink. Still counts as successful, though, right?
I can already see the regret in her eyes. Amazing night. This city rules.
its weird that my cat bites every fat chick i bring home. i repeat every fat chick, qhT KINDA FRIEND ARE YOU
maybe if I avoid him long enough we could skip the talking part of "we need to talk"
we had a full conversation and he only brought up drugs twice. overall I'd call it a success
He said he remembers me...standing on a snowy roof, smoking a blunt, yelling "you're pretty fly for a white guy" at him. Sounds about right.
dude. i woke up on a random lawn wearing only my boxers, with all my clothes hung in the branches of a nearby tree... no more shrooms
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