i hate when u poo a lot and when u wipe theres no poopy residue on the TP. it makes me feel like my butt hole is hiding something from me. just had 2tell sum1.
suntimes in life you find a rare opportunity, mine was bonin my gf in front of the tv
Her birthday cake consisted of a shot of tequila with a candle in it
look what he's done to me, i actually want to be a stripper now.
it's my sixth sense. If there's an orgy within 20 miles of me i'll know about if. Or be a part of it.
Just heard Miley Cyrus' version of "Every Rose Has Its Thorn". Fuck everything. If you don't have an std you have no right to remake this song
Do you think the guy at the front desk was watching us last night? Although we were in a public pool, therefore our tits were free game.
Don't feel bad sweetie, you're not the only classy one in town. I'm still driving around with that tupperware of tequila in my cup holder from last week's Margarita Monday.
I can't leave your house without my underwear spending the night.
How are you going to come here and fuck on our couch ? That's everyones couch
How do I feel about a girl who has a g string tattooed on
you'll probably come home to me baked as fuck and shirtless
We just took an Eskimo family picture.. It's pretty cute honestly
He handed me a beer to drink as he went down on me. I want to keep him
You don't know the true meaning of fear until your girlfriend's niece insists on sitting on your lap with 20 mg of Viagra coursing through your veins.
Randomize
