Forget about socially acceptable. Make me happy instead
therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
Oh my god. I just envisioned myself eating panda meat. I need to get out of this class.
I just sneezed cum. He better have a damn good day at work.
The state of Wisconsin is just irresponsible for letting me buy this many fireworks
Last night she showed me how to clean my bowl and now she's drunk making peanut butter filled cookies. Best. Roommate. Ever.
Let me make this really simple. We woke up this morning and fucked three times. When I got up and took a shower she cleaned up the mess from last night and did the dishes. Then we went out and she bought me brunch. I don't give a FUCK how much you don't like her.
I want an alcoholic time machine so we could skip to new years eve
I really don't want to. I just don't know how to nicely say "dude I'm having a rough time in life right now and I just need to dress like a stripper cop, get shit faced, and have dirty crazy sex"
If you ever bitch out on 72oz margarita night again, this friendship is over
Dude. 21 days till I'm 21. It's the 21 day countdown. The 25 days of Christmas can suck my dick.
My goal for the weekend: procure a blowjob using only stern glances, hand gestures, and crudely-drawn stick figures.
I'd give my right arm to start my period. My right arm. Thats more significant then my left.
Car sex in a public place. Boo ya.
lord you gonna make me abandon my soup for tasteful catboy nudes
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