Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
Ikea night.
?
Insert tab A into swedish slot B
yeah that facebook group of people who have had sex with me probably isn't to discreet...
I love drunk self when he leaves a prepacked bong for the morning... in the bathroom.
THERE ARE SO MANY GREAT DICKS IN THE WORLD. HOW DID I NOT DISCOVER THIS SOONER!?
just heard a glass bottle fall in lecture and my first thought was to yell party foul.....is it friday yet?
Down at Ground Zero right now. So many people here. It's the most patriotic game of grabass Ive ever seen.
at the time it didn't seem likely that you would ever find the cake in your underwear
You have like just as much sex as me and I have a brand new bf. That does not add up. That is not right.
He painted a swimsuit on me. Naked day at the lake was a success.
We kind of crashed their funeral party. Oops.
You took all of your clothes off and tried to seduce me and while trying to seduce me you decided you were too drunk and passed out.
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
I just opened my travel toothbrush holder and it smelled like vodka...maybe a vodka cranberry. This says a lot about my vacations.
My conscious state is steadily increasing towards drunkenness.
Randomize
