I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
my ass hurt today after the party last night. I wnt to the doctors and they found a coin in a ziplock bag with a note from you. WHAT THE FUCK DID U DO TO ME???
I'm going to come in a little later this morning....there's no heterosexual way to say this....$1 flip flop sale at old navy
Dude she's on meds. He has a ginormous penis. Ur A dumbass. That concludes our feelings chat. Dim Sumday?
Im otw to class. I was at the Library. Just past three girls with a bottle of tequila playing dizzy bat.
Dude, sorry for live texting you my binge drinking. If you'd like me to do the same for my hangover, I can share that I just had to sit down while q-tipping my ears.
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
He told me"I think your ready for this" and went into his closet whipped out a movie certiffied light saber.
I'm pretty sure that's why we have such good sex because we are secretly trying to kill each other
I also woke up in a guys bed in a Reptar shirt yesterday morning staring at a movie theater sized poster of the not as popular Air Bud franchise movie Super Buddies.
Is it immoral to trade sex for the use of his laundry room?
So? Find me, fuck me, then you can go to sleep and I'll leave.
Wow. That's the most amazing thing anyone has ever said to me.
So I missed the eclipse because I was masturbating.
Also I just had a pointless meeting and the only thing I accomplished were my kegals
Bro, I was just laying in bed with this girl and her boyfriend came an woke me up
Randomize
