Grinding on my ninth grade teacher. Dreams really do come true
Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
Pretty sure I went to the bar in my bathing suit, sweat pants, and high heels.
This is even worse then that time I fucked a guy just because he had air conditioning.
That's the point dumbass, I can't use my boss as a reference cause they'd have to fucking call him in prison.
legit question. can i put a condom down our garbage disposal? my rents are coming over in 20
so serious though like its almost like I'm playing a game that's my life and Im always losing
I flashed my cleaning lady and don't remember who I went on a date with. I know who I woke up with though, that counts right?
He said the main reason he fucked me was cause of my storm trooper tattoo. IT ATTRACHES ALL THE HOT NERDS
After we banged he volunteered to ducksit while I went to work. I think that's true love.
No more pre-dentist shots, I just puked on my hygienist
I told you naked hot tub wrestling would turn bad now one of us has a gash on the head and another a black eye
I can't tell if my heart is fluttering because I love him... or if it's palpitating from all the coke.
That is our entire relationship. We match bowls and give each other head. What more could you possibly want?
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