You are possibly the most enthusiastic, likable bad influence I've ever met.
New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
I can't remember if the bartender cut you off after you broke your glass or after you wished the bar a happy winter solstice during your karaoke number.
We eventually get in a cab (after david tried to hail multiple regular cars and some sort of shuttle bus)
He got tattooed, peirced, and we're pretty sure he got rufeed by that fat chick. He was like a walking spring break stereotype.
I should not be in class today. For the professors sake.
the paramedics asked what clubs id be in next weekend so they can plan ahead.
Did u see the proverb she left as a comment on my picture?
It is officially Christmas time in Chicago. There's a drunk hobo on the CTA singing the first 2 lines of Frosty the Snowman over and over and over.
Well to me, someone is not really my friend until we go to a mcdonalds drunk at 4am. It's like a right of passage
she texted me 'with freud,' which i thought was drunk for 'i'm with my friend.' but nope, she was actually on a statue of the psychologist sigmund freud.
Please tell me how the stripper got back to Sarah's from the trailer park
There is a severe lack of banging on that itinerary... I'd like a revision on my desk within the hour
Have a booty call at 3am, stopped for tacos at 2:30. It's 2:55 and I still haven't ordered but can't jump the curb to get out of line because there is a cop in front of me. What am I doing with my life?
Lady at the airport across from me just pulled a cat out of her bag. can't deal with this right now..
Randomize
